Oh that gossip girl…
It’s everywhere…
At work, in the neighbourhood, on social media.
They are all those who rarely focus on themselves, their problems, their character traits
that need fixing and are constantly dealing with others.
What other people always say, what they do, what they wear, who comes into their house, what they bought new… and on and on.
Unfortunately, sometimes gossip is not limited to a simple description of events but is inherent in them.
and the required dose of criticism or, to put it better, “censure”.
There has to be someone for the gossips to deal with and this may be the best solution,
the solution that takes away their time to deal with their own issues.
What is gossip
We should point out that gossip, according to researchers from the University of Arizona, has no preference for the leaf.
So it has wrongly become a stereotype of women as chatterboxes, and gossips.
According to the research it is indeed all a matter of character and not gender.
What it’s like to work with gossips
How do we deal with our colleague or client who we have found that gossip is their hobby?
Let’s go to analyze this habit and see what lies behind this need.
As we have said in previous articles, people who judge someone very harshly and negatively
and even without extenuating circumstances, in this way they hide their own insecurity and low self-esteem.
It’s a way of showing how bad and incompetent the other person is.
By underestimating others they often think they are elevating themselves and standing out.
But just because I can’t see my hump doesn’t mean that the other guy can’t see it.
In all the mistakes they make, they use others as an excuse.
It’s always other people’s fault and they never take responsibility.
Their environment is permanently competitive.
They feel used and almost never accept criticism.
They don’t judge but they always point out what the other person does and doesn’t do well.
Other people’s failures are the best of them.
What attitude to take towards gossips
Because most of them have no real friends, being gossips creates social bonds.
Psychologists suggest a key phrase that immediately stops gossip.
“Why are you telling me this now?”
Such a phrase shows the gossip in an absolute way that there is no desire to enter into their absurd logic.
It will take them by surprise and they will hardly have a good and acceptable answer.
A typical story is one that tells of Socrates and his attitude towards the gossip.
once someone came to Socrates and said to him.
“I’ll tell you what I heard about a friend of yours.”
Socrates stopped him and said.
“Before you tell me you’re going to put it through three sieves.
The first is the truth, the second sieve if it’s something good and the third sieve is what you tell me is useful,
if not then why should I listen to it?”
As the Spanish proverb says,
“Whoever gossips with you, gossips with you.”
In conclusion, a well-intelligent and decent man realizes that being a gossip
is always disrespectful to another person.
Do not forget that silence in all times and in all peoples is considered gold.
Politely avoid getting involved in any such discussion and the safety distance from such people
is the best thing you can do.
Yours sincerely,
Elizabeth Makri.
P.S. I would like to thank my very good friend Apostolia Sklavos because her help in writing this article is invaluable…
